Confronted

First time posting because I’m genuinely so confused and conflicted by this situation. I (28F) was laid off two months ago and have been doing a lot of interviews. Two weeks ago, I was invited to do a first round interview at a nonprofit that really interested me. I mentioned it to my sister, who happened to have a professional contact at this nonprofit. She asked if I wanted her to send my resume along to her contact, and not thinking much of it, I agreed. Yesterday, I had my first interview, a one-on-one with the hiring manager. I thought it was going well overall, but got the sense that the hiring manager was under a lot of stress and pressure. Then, at the end of the interview, I asked about next steps in the process. Before answering, the hiring manager asked about the email they received from a colleague about my resume. I told the truth, that my sister sent it to her coworker, and the interview really turned. The hiring manager said that it spoke of privilege and put my values into question, and that they were less inclined to hire me after receiving that email. Some other details that might be relevant: 1. I am queer and a person of color, which is fairly easy to find out if you google me. They mentioned both of these things in the conversation, seemingly trying to understand if I felt pressure to use a connection based on those factors. 2. All of my answers to their questions were recorded except for this one, which struck me as odd. 3. The hiring manager alluded that I was a front runner in the process, but is continuing to accept applications. They scheduled the interview with me immediately after seeing my resume, before receiving this email. Now, they’re saying that they are keeping the posting open for a while and will not contact me for a final interview until mid to late next month. 4. The hiring manager told me that, whether or not I get this job, to never “make this mistake” again. This caught me off guard because I thought using your network was a common practice in job hunting. My sister and spouse are both furious about how this interview played out, but I’m more conflicted. I can somewhat see where the hiring manager is coming from in wanting to hire someone with less connections, and maybe it was unprofessional to have a family member put in that word for me. Ultimately, I’m looking for advice on how to proceed. Should I stop trying to use my connections in my job search? Was this hiring manager right in confronting me, or was there a line crossed? Any insights would be appreciated! Edit to add: Thank you everyone for the advice and insights! It seems most people agree that the hiring manager was way out of line. Some folks did point out that it was a little weird for the referral to be sent after I already had an interview and it could be seen as nepotism. I can understand the hiring manager having that perspective on it, but after reading the comments and sitting with it, I do think they went too far in addressing the issue. I’m interviewing at a few other places right now and hope to get an offer from one of them. I’d really like to withdraw from this job immediately, but this is the second time this year I’ve been unemployed from federal funding cuts and I’m just not in a position where I can be too picky. If I get any other offer, I’ll take it and keep this organization in my back pocket just in case. But if I do get another job offer and can withdraw my candidacy, I plan to let the HM know that it was inappropriate. My sister is planning to let her contact know, as well, once things fully shake out. Thank you all again!